Tooting, Balham and the Fucking Joggers

Balham Lodge

Balham Lodge

Last Thursday evening I was in Tooting and ate in the Mirch Masala which had been recommended to me by a friend. The interior is basic but the food is simple and good with fast and polite service. The only thing I’d criticise is the modern obsession with noise but this is not unique to the Mirch. Modern bars and restaurants seem to deliberately omit noise damping furnishings and consequently one is forced to endure a cacophony of other people’s conversation rebounding off the walls and ceiling. Mirch Masala was by no means the worst, that award might easily go to somewhere like All-Bar-1. Friday I spent in Balham which seems more trendy and the area around the corner of Balham High Road and Bedford Hill seem, to me, to be another restaurant ghetto like many that have sprung up all over London. I browsed around the repetitious identi-kit restaurants and finally opted for the Seascape Fish Bar which is a traditional Fish and Chip shop where I was served immediately and was sitting down and eating within minutes.

I spent Friday night in the Balham Lodge, a beautiful old London house on the corner of Bedford Hill and Hillbury Road, within easy walking distance of both Tooting Bec Common and Balham Underground station. Both the exterior and interior of this hotel are very well maintained and beautifully decorated. My room was a little small and oddly shaped but very clean and functional with TV and wifi.

Tooting Bec Common
Tooting Bec Common

On Saturday morning I walked a while on the common, the benches sparkling in crystal frost and a mist rising from the playing field. With the sun in my eyes I watched the people walking their dogs and a hoard of people playing football. And the joggers, Ah the joggers. Physical exercise for it’s own sake. Sedentary office workers unwilling to walk to work lest they rumple their suits forced to run around in their underclothes to get their pulses racing. In previous centuries one strolled around parks and along river banks. But now, now one doges the fucking joggers. If they want to run why don’t they fuck off and live in the country?

Obsession with sport has two advantages as far as society is concerned. First it keeps us fit so we can become more productive workers and second the endless discussion of the inanity of the scoring and point systems ensures that our brains are kept in an infinite loop of trivia and subsequently we are rendered too stupid to question anything.

“Play football on Sunday?” – “NO! FUCK OFF! I was too busy laying in bed thinking of ways to undermine the foundations of the corporate-military complex…..or something.”

Yachts

Yachts

Advertisements

One thought on “Tooting, Balham and the Fucking Joggers

  1. Excellent stuff Nigel. Good observations except Mirch Masala. I would not rate its food as “good”. . Nadeem

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s